The silence between us stretches so much that our bodies move further apart 
we exchange bland words that leave a bitter taste in our mouths 
and our hands haven’t met yet 

There’s a magnetic field between us that pulls us together 
but once we touch, we repel away from each other,


I can’t comprehend him; he’s drafted in a language only he understands.  

I’m not myself around him 
part of me wants to shun him 
despise him 
but I can’t,

I locate pieces of him through other people 
the more pieces I find the clearer he becomes 
now he exists as a whole man in my heart 
with missing pieces that only he can grant me
 
I wish I never met him.

His name is on my tongue every time I speak 
my mind goes blank when I see him 
all I want to do is explore him 

I want to love him enough to make him smile back at me, 
be gentle with me 
warm enough for me to dip my feet in 
warm enough for me to strip down to nothing but my soul 

But we’re still strangers.
 
 
He exists in my heart
I only exist in the couple hours we get to be together 
and my name is just another name 
could be forgotten 

So, we remain muffled for now
words too hefty between us 
emotions too fuzzy 

Do we hate each other?

We uncover ourselves in each other’s eyes 
and perhaps that’s why we’re too anxious to move closer 
because we don’t want to face ourselves yet
to love ourselves yet,